Marriage?

Marriage, ha!
You think I have time for that stuff?
I've got hours upon hours of things to do,
books to read and games to play,
I've got paint to watch dry, by God!
And you guys keep telling me marriage, marriage, marriage?
The gall! The audacity!
I can't think of a better time to yell
and scream
and shout
and live the way I want to!
The way I want to!
I want to sit here and ponder,
and examine life,
and climb to the top of my tower and watch!
But the people of my life,
the aunts and uncles and sisters and brothers of my life
pull me down and out and tell me
go get married!

I don't even know how!
Do the books and movies tell me how?
I haven't learned a thing from them,
a single goddamn thing!
What am I supposed to do?
Rush into this blind?
Well there's no other way to do it, is there?
Is there?

You guys can sit at a table with me and tell me you understand life.
And then tell me your problems,
and I'll sit there and listen.
The same old problems,
the same old stories,
the same stupid old vows and the same ideas.
And then you can sit back and wait,
wait for me to tell you mine,
and I'll tell you what my problem is:
I don't understand yours!
You refuse to climb the tower with me.
You refuse to go explore the universe with me.
You refuse to live for anyone else but everyone else,
because everyone else says
go get married!

Sure, I know it feels good.
Love can feel good.
Love can really hurt and tear,
but it can feel good.
But hell, who cares?
I've got better things to do than
sit around here
or wait around there
or chase you to feel good!
I've got research
and philosophy
and I get enough goddamn social interaction as it is!
I'll be Newton if I have to!
If I have to!

So you can sit with me and talk with me,
you can smile and laugh with me,
challenge me
debate with me
explore with me
even play freakin' blackjack
or rummy or hearts or texas with me
but I'll never tell you to
go get married.